No matter how you put it, moving back in with parents at 40 is very frustrating. While it's often completely justified, our society looks down on those who move to their old parents' place as an adult. The change doesn't have to be permanent, though, and there are plenty of ways for you to cope with the fact that you'll have to share a roof with your mother and father.
While going back to your parents' home might feel like a nightmare, it will give you enough time to figure out your next steps. Unless you have to stay with them permanently, you'll be out on your own again as soon as you save up some money.
Many people wonder why any grown-up person would want to go back to their parents' house after living alone for decades. While everyone has a ton of hopes and dreams after leaving the nest, not everything has to go according to plan. Life is full of surprises, and it's not uncommon for people to go back to their parents' place well into adulthood. While you probably never thought that you'd have to do it, there are more than a few good reasons to move back even after you turn 40:
● End of a relationship or divorce - Divorce rates have been going up over the last few years, and couples often separate less than a year after moving in together. Many are not adequately prepared to handle the separation, either financially or emotionally. Going back to your parents will provide the support you need in this difficult time.
● Getting fired or struggling financially - Money is one of the main reasons adults choose to move back with their mom and dad. For starters, losing a job at the age of forty hits much harder than when you are 25. Finding a new job in today's economy is also very tough, so it can be a while before you get a good offer. Those that can't afford to pay their rent will likely have to find a cheaper apartment and move in a hurry, which will only cause a ton of relocation stress. It might be better to move back to your old house until you get back on your feet.
● Taking care of your mom and dad - Last but not least, many adults will gladly move to another city just to be closer to their family. Considering your mom and dad are probably much older now, living close by will allow you to keep an eye on them and their health much more easily. After all, they were there for you when you were relocating for the first time, so the least you can do is try to make their lives a little bit easier.
Having to move back home at 40 can be pretty frustrating, particularly if you're used to living on your own. However, no matter how difficult it might be to adjust to your new situation, remember that the entire thing is only a temporary solution to your problems. While your mom and dad would probably love to have you back, try not to overstay your welcome. In fact, it's best to start looking for a place as soon as the situation allows it. In the meantime, find ways to cope with your new living arrangement.
No matter how large your parents' house might be, you will almost certainly have to downsize for the move. Deciding what to keep and what to get rid of is certainly not easy, so you'll have to figure out which items you truly need before the relocation. Considering you're not relocating to an empty home, there's a real chance you'll have very little room for all your belongings. With that in mind, write down everything you want to bring over, but focus on things that are necessary or hold incredible emotional value. Everything else can be replaced once you move out.
Seeing how you probably won't be able to fit most of your things at the parents' place, decide what you're going to do with them before the move. If you're staying with them indefinitely, selling some of your stuff might be the best option. While you don't have to go and get rid of everything, it's safe to assume that you can sell your kitchen items or anything that's easily replaceable. If something can't be sold, donate it to your local charity or have it recycled.
On the other hand, those who are planning to move out in a few months to a year will probably want to hold on to most of their belongings. However, while using some clever storage ideas will help you keep a lot of smaller things like books and clothes, you still won't have enough room for all your large items and furniture. The good news is that storing everything will help you avoid replacing the entire inventory the next time you move. If you don't already have a storage unit, find one on the app for moving called Mod24.
Considering everyone has unique needs and preferences, don't be afraid to set boundaries. Although having this conversation might make everyone uncomfortable, it should still be one of the first things you do after moving back. No matter how much you all love and care for each other, some ground rules are needed to keep peace in the house.
For starters, you must respect each other's privacy, so anything personal should be off-limits. While you can all freely use pots and pans and other kitchen supplies, never enter their room without permission, and vice versa. Always knock before opening the door, and you'll avoid a ton of uncomfortable situations. Last but not least, you shouldn't be poking around each other's important documents no matter how close you are. Opening other people's mail without permission is punishable by law, but there's also the risk of forgetting to deal with the paperwork, possibly causing someone to miss an important payment.
As a full-grown adult, you shouldn't be reminded to clean up after yourself. To keep things simple, try to leave everything as it was before you used it. Don't leave your clothes all around the place and expect your mom to find the socks you've misplaced. Not only does this make you a bad roommate, but you'll also be disrespecting them. Of course, this goes both ways. If they keep leaving their fragile items in the way, kindly remind them to move them. Otherwise, it's not your responsibility if something accidentally gets broken.
Even though you will be sharing the same space, getting used to being around your mom and dad constantly won't be easy. That's why it's crucial to find a simple way to communicate with them. While you'll probably disagree on many things, all members of the household need to respect one another. Yelling won't do anyone any good, so don't raise your voice no matter how frustrating a situation may be. If an argument gets too intense, it's better to leave for a bit and clear your head than say something you can't take back.
Try to deal with any issues that come up right away, as leaving the discussions for later will only make the situation more uncomfortable for everyone involved. While having to move back might be stressful for you, remember that it's also hard on your old mom and dad. Somebody who has lived a certain way for a long time will certainly take longer to adjust to such a significant change. Try to be patient with them even if they are not the nicest people you know. Unless you have children, they are probably the closest real family you've got at the end of the day.
My life must be over since I'm moving back in with my parents at 40, right? While it might be pretty frustrating, look on the bright side and try to make the best of what you can with the situation you find yourself in. Considering there are a ton of benefits of moving back home at 40, you should never feel ashamed for making this decision.
As we already mentioned, money is one of the main reasons adults move back to their parents' place even when they are well in their forties. There's some good news, though. Considering you will technically be gaining two roommates, the move will significantly reduce your overall living expenses. Even if you do end up paying rent and splitting the bills for utilities, you'll still need much less time to save money to move out and get a place of your own once again.
While having to live with your mom and dad can be stressful at times, remember that they will also share all the house chores with you. Whether you're tired of cleaning, doing laundry, or cooking, it's good to know you have someone to lean on. There's nothing better than getting home from a long day at work only to see that there's dinner waiting for you on the table. Of course, don't take everything they do for granted, though, and try to contribute as much as you can.
As you can see, having to live with your mother and father as an adult is nothing to worry about. While some situations might get tense, the only thing that matters is that you can count on each other in times of need. Trust us, considering how long it takes to organize a move, you'll probably regret every argument you’ve ever had with them. Once you're finally ready to move out and start the next chapter in your life, deal with all the paperwork and begin packing furniture and the rest of your belongings. Preparing a move takes a lot of work, though, so you might be better off hiring a professional to assist you.
Choosing a relocation company is not easy, though. Unless you already have someone in mind, Mod24 will help you find the best movers in your area. Our moving app features only certified professionals, so you won't have to worry about running into scammers while using it. You can use the app to compare moving companies and their prices, allowing you to get the best deal for your buck. These are only some of the main Mod24 features, so feel free to contact us to find out more about our platform's other benefits. You'll quickly learn that using our moving company app is the easiest way to find a mover that suits all your needs.